My Reality

     A opportunity to move out of the area I grew up in had become feasible. I grew tired of my hometown and desperately needed a change. My goals were to experience life, and find new ways of thinking. The "vote for the lesser evil" mindset was deeply ingrained in the culture of where I grew up. A "keep your head down, and don't rock the boat" mentality was embedded in us. As teens we fought against it, sadly as we aged, many of my peers adopted the complacency their parents had. I became an outcast from the outcasts. I needed a change, but how would that look for my health?     I spoke with my doctors. All of them were so helpful and supportive, that making this decision became more difficult. With their encouragement, we found specialist that my doctors approved of, and I started making the calls. During those calls I had learned that the area I was moving to was the leading clinic in the world for the type of surgery I have, a Fontan Clinic. I could do ...

  The Monarch Butterfly is one of the greatest pollinators in North America. Decorated in the very famous orange base, black stripes, and white spots, these butterflies make the greatest migration out of all other insects. From the heart of Mexico to the base of Canada, their migration track has been found all over the United States.    When I was a little girl, my mother would take me to Natural Bridges every October. Tucked in the eucalyptus trees were thousands upon thousands of Monarch Butterflies. Little did I know these magnificent insects would become one of my most cherished accomplishments.          I was always an avid animal and nature lover. From a young age I never liked eating animals, and since the age of 18, kept a vegetarian to plant based diet. By my early 20s I fully embraced the vegan lifestyle. My mother was also an animal lover, and taught me how to rescue dogs from the side of the road. With her knowledge I expanded ...

   Two years ago I had very long, strong, beautiful hair. However every time I looked in the mirror, I could not stand the women looking back. Two years ago I was becoming very sick again. Two years ago I had to beg for help from my family who hated the fact that I was talking with my now deceased mother. Two years ago I was in an extremely abusive relationship, but at that time I had no idea how it had effected me so much. I was not my true self. I had allowed negativity into my heart and eat away at my days. I was always in a fight with either my sister, dad, or now ex boyfriend, and I could not understand why this was happening.    Now two years later I am able to reflect and understand what was happening during that time.    It began three years ago. I was losing my mother to cancer, and I was the only person in the family that would talk to her. Everyone else could not move on from the past she had created. They hated her and could not wait for her...

Sitting in front of me, a young blond hair blue eyed spark of a woman, daughter of an alcoholic.   Strong as she may seem, hidden are the wounds.   Confidant as she may look, always looking in the mirror.   Brave as she may act, hides under the covers during the day.  I used to resent this woman in front of me. For she made my life hell. Then one day, something came over me. I needed to see her.  I said not much to her, kept my distance. Hours passed. Finally....    "Do you remember what he did?" -YES How could I forget that cruel man.  She talks more. Confesses she did not control herself very well. But what broke my heart.....  "I thought that being tough, wearing my heart on my sleeve, would help me get over it.... How wrong I was" She is so young.  I lived with her for years, could hardly stay in the same room with her. Now. I didn't want to leave her side. I saw it. There. The change.  I knew ...

                                                         The Reality of My Life     When someone first meets me they would never believe that I live with a very serious heart condition. My bright eyes, loving smile, and positive outlook of my life hides a very serious and painful condition. I am living with half a heart. I have Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome (HLHS). I have had 5 open heart surgeries; having these surgeries left me with cirrhosis of the liver, hypertension, and scoliosis along with other mild issues.   Every morning I wake up at 6:50am; usually I haven’t slept well due to my back tensing up in the middle of the night. The first thing I do is go to the kitchen and drink a cold cup of water right away to wake myself up. I then splash cold water on my face to wake up the rest of my body. Most of the tim...